Backward in talking (1933) : Susan Isaacs talks about the deep emotional connection between a child's emotional state and their language development.

 November 15, 1933 in The Nursery World  

 

Backward in talking 

 

“Speech is such a complex function both as regards its intellectual content and its emotional value, that it can get held up for a variety of reasons.”

 

“Optimistic” writes, “My husband wishes me to write to you about our elder son, aged two years and one month. He understands almost anything we say to him but does not speak himself yet. He can say ‘Mum’, ‘Dad’, Nan’, and ‘Bab’,  but I think my husband is right in saying that these words do not have the right meaning for him. When he says, ‘Mum’ he does not appear to mean me, for instance! He leads a normal, active life, has splendid health, sleeps all night, and for about two hours each morning, is full of high spirits and plays intelligently with his toys. I am not worried myself about his backwardness in talking but my husband – who is extremely clever – is disappointed; he longs for the boy to talk. He gets plenty of ‘talking to’ and ‘playing with’ – though he seems to prefer to play alone and seems less inclined to use his vocabulary when he is cutting a tooth. He has three more to cut so perhaps he will become more chatty when these are through. I read your advice in THE NURSERY WORLD each week and feel that you will be able to reassure my husband better than I can!” 

 

It seems to me quite probable that your little boy’s backwardness in speaking is only a temporary hold up, and that he will soon begin to speak and go ahead as rapidly as if he had begun earlier. Speech is such a complex function, both as regards its intellectual content and its emotional value, that it can get held up for a great variety of reasons. Sometimes the retardation is simply due to the child’s feelings. At other times it is definitely due to a general inhibition of learning or of intellectual development as such. Your feelings that the teething process and his willingness or unwillingness to talk may be connected in some way is quite a likely one, since the pain and irritation in the mouth resulting from teething always does have some psychological effect, and in some children would take the form of reluctance to use the mouth for other purposes. I think you are right in feeling that there is nothing yet to be anxious about in the boy’s not speaking. If, however, within the next six months he did not begin to use words more freely and actively, it would certainly be worth your while to have the matter looked into by a psychological expert. Will you let me know again what happens, and if necessary I will then suggest someone who would be able to discover the cause of the retardation and suggest methods of dealing with it? 

            Meanwhile I would not try to force him to speak or pay any particular attention to the matter. Let your relations with him be natural. It may be that the boy has sensed his father’s disappointment with his not speaking and that might act inhibitively, since he may feel that he ought to speak just as well as his Daddy, or not at all.