A problem at school, 1930 – Susan Isaacs recommends professional advice for a child frightened by other children’s behaviour towards him. Interestingly she does not mention the word ‘bullying’.

June 11, 1930 in Home and School "Readers’ Questions"

Problems with other children

“Mrs W” writes: “I am very interested in your articles, and wonder if you could help me with my problem. My little boy of seven started school last year, and seemed to like it very much, and was very happy at first – til about Christmas time. Since then he has taken quite an aversion to it, and it is all I can do to persuade him to go off to school in the mornings. I have managed to get out of him that the bigger boys at school used to frighten him with pistols, saying they were going to shoot him, and would put him up against a wall and fire at him. If they had been a little less rough with him, and there had not been quite so many of them, he might have seen that nothing terrible happened after their plays, and would thus have got over his fright. I can see that to a child of his vivid imagination this treatment would have a bad effect, but surely he ought to have conquered this feeling of fear by now and learnt to stand up for himself. He seems to have been greatly affected by it all, and now shuns the companionship of other children.

            “His father went to the school and spoke about the ways the bigger boys frightened him, and I think that stopped it, but still R. has not go over his fear. If I could get him to play with other little boys, they could play at soldiers, and so accustom him to make-believe and get him used to the sound of pistols; but he gets very nervous and starts to cry whenever I suggest having other children in to play. Can you give me some help or advice on how to deal with this question? R. is such a dear, jolly little fellow otherwise.”

            I think you would do well to have first-hand advice about this problem, and I would like to urge a consultation very much. They are quite beyond the control of the child himself, and may affect his later life considerably. Even if he manages to hide them for a time, they might come out again at any time or crisis in later life; and they are obviously going to handicap the boy’s social development. It would, therefore, really be worthwhile having psychological advice, and I hope very much that you will arrange to do so. I should be glad suggest consultants.