June 11th, 1930 in The Nursery World
Difficulties with the bright child and the nervous child
“Kim” writes: “Your articles are so helpful that I often feel I would like to have a good long talk you about our little boy. However, a letter is the next best thing. Paul is four and a half, not very big, but very ‘sharp’ and intelligent for his age. He has no brothers and sisters, and is intensely interested in figures and dates. Anything with numbers on attracts him instantly, and his favourite Christmas gift was a small calendar which he can change every day. He and it are inseparable. Before he was three he could count up to 99 and back to one without a mistake! Then one day he asked me what came next, and I told him 100. In a few days he could count to 199, and now he can count up to anything. A year ago, i.e.when he was three and a half, he could tell the time to a minute exactly, and by the time he was four he had taught himself to read and write (in block capitals) the date every day on his blackboard! He still does that, and, of course, can say and spell the days of the week and the months in their right order. I have never definitely taught him anything (except during the last few weeks the sounds of the letters). He knows the alphabet; but I have always answered his questions.
“But this is the most extraordinary thing – he likes to ask people when their birthdays are. On being told the date, he will tell them, after a few seconds’ consideration, the day on which that date will fall, even if it is six or none months ahead! Or if it has gone by six or nine months, or even a year ago! How does he do it? It seems almost uncanny, for he is always right. What shall we do about sending him to school? He hasn’t many little friends, unfortunately. I play with him and take him out as much as I can. He also attends a dancing class during the winter. How is one to know that a child of this kind is not being ‘forced’ at school in order to be a ‘credit to his form,’ etc., etc?
“Personally, I would like him to ‘run wild’ til he is seven, only I think more child companionship would be better for him. He is not very anxious to play with other children. He is full of fun, and loves a game with daddy in the evening before he goes to bed at 6.15. I was very interested in Dr. Cyril Burt’s ‘Intelligence Tests’ on the wireless the other evening. He said a child of eight, with ordinary intelligence, should be able to repeat five or six numbers easily without a mistake. Paul can repeat five numbers, but gets muddled with six. He can also reverse three numbers correctly. He is very fond of music, and loves his Nursery Rhyme records, all of which he can sing by heart. The tunes are not always ‘in tune,’ but the rhythm is right. He has always been happy and contented. Twice recently I have been a bit worried about his behaviour when other children have been here. Quite suddenly, for no apparent reason, he has refused to join in the games – nothing I do will make him. What ought I to do? Ignore it, or think of some suitable little punishment? Is it because he is no longer the centre of attraction? I have talked to him about it, so we shall see if it happens again, but in the meantime I should like your advice.”
Your little boy is obviously quite unusually gifted in arithmetic, and must be well above the average level of intelligence all round. Intelligence of that order is very delightful to watch, especially when it goes along with health and fun and contentment. There is really no risk of the boy being “forced” at school, particularly in the early years. When the scholarship years come along, or in the senior years of school life, there is little more possibility of this; but it is never a serious risk with the really intelligent child. The children who do suffer from ‘forcing' are far more often those of a mere average ability, whose parents are too ambitious for them, or who are too over-ambitious themselves. They then have to over-work in order to make up for medium gifts; and the actual stress of desire to do well, and shame and disappointment if they do not, create a severe emotional strain.
But in the case of a child like your boy, he is certain to be ahead of the average for his age, all through his school career, without any particular effort. A child who can teach himself so much and so easily will not be unduly bothered by the demands which any reasonably good school will make of him. In fact, the real risk is that he will be bored in school. That does often happen with the abler children, unless the school knows how to keep ahead of their needs. Nevertheless, an early school life would be good for the boy, and solitary play, or too much adult companionship, is not very advisable. A school where plenty of games were played, and there was plenty of music and drama and handicrafts, would give the boy all the advantages of social life with other children, and the all-round mental fare would help to balance his special gifts in mathematics.
But it would be a mistake to scold or punish the boy because he does not always join freely in the games with other children. Forced play is no play at all, and has no social or educational value. If the boy does not want to join in any particular games, or on any particular day, there is no reason why he should not be just left out of it.
